The 5-pin relays have a "normally closed" contact that allows the relay to power two items, one when it's energized, and one when it's released. Just ignore the "normally closed" contact when you're wiring the headlights. If you've got a 5-wire plug, just clip the 5th. wire off even with the plug to keep it from shorting out, and fill the hole in the plug for that wire with RTV gasket sealer if you choose.
Jerry

"It is better to be silent and be thought a fool than to speak and eliminate all doubt!" - Abraham Lincoln
Cringe and wail in fear, Eloi- - - - -we Morlocks are on the hunt!
There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self. - Ernest Hemingway
Love your enemies and drive 'em nuts!