When I got up this morning there was this smell. At first I figured the Rocket had dropped his normal morning payload but I was wrong. As I approached my home office the smell got worse.
Turns out its this page from all the BS being flung around by my fellow brothers.
As the SAA of this great ODSS it is my duty to return the society to order when things get out of align. Since the $hit is getting pretty deep pretty fast here, I shal hold a quick, trial by fire for each that have stepped out of line. But first, my opening comment.
FACT:
The Presidential Motorcade is required to consist of 1/2 ton trucks. This purpose is for swift and speedy escapes when the President is in imminent danger. Further, The President is a very busy and important man, he does not have the time or the patience to travel at 43mph! Also The President also likes to ride in comfort! So traveling with Mr. Milliman in Heavy D would not fulfil this requirement.
Now, to deal with my out-of-line brothers:
Brother Gott:
Original drivelines could go 80-85, its just too darn loud! You will be let off the hook with a warning....
Brother Roache:
Hauling Hay CAN be done in a 1/2 ton! Further, when have you seen a 1/2 ton broken down? Also, how many distributors have I put in your truck? Seems like these "Big Boys" rely heavily of the 1/2 tonners to shuttle parts and mechanics to where they are needed. Sentence; 20 pushups and go open Dempsey's hood and wax the valve cover.
Brother Marlow:
You started this whole mess, I hold you responsible for getting all these brothers fired up! Sentence; You need to rotate your lugnuts, 45 pushups and your sir shall not wash your truck for 2 weeks!!
Brother Milliman:
Referring to the President and the SAA as a "homo" is a felony offense! You sir owe Mr. President 100 pushups. Further, the next time the Presidential Motorcade graces Stovebolt HQ we shall be parked in the best parking spaces available and yes, you will be reffered to as Shirley.....
Bottom line men, as Brother Milliman has been quoted "None of us are as strong as all of us" We need the 1/2 ton bullets along with the big boy slugs to have fun and get the job done. Each truck has a duty and a purpose. For that, I am glad to call each of you brother....
Mr President, have you anything to add???
