You're going to need a resistor wired into the system that won't allow enough current to back up and supply the ignition, while still leaking enough voltage to operate the regulator. That's a pretty common problem when you don't have an idiot light in the circuit. The light acted as the resistor on the older remote-regulator systems. The ones with an ammeter used a resistor in place of the light.
why not upgrade to a self-regulated alternator, and eliminate the separate regulator? They're considerably higher capacity, too.
Jerry


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