Mr. President ... As always, your safety and protection are our foremost concern, and we, your security detail, take your personal safety very seriously indeed. But... Um, due to budget cuts and threat of sequestration, your "enroute full coverage security envelope" has been reduced to us crossing our fingers, providing you with a cd of Pavarotti singing "Ave Maria" and generally thinking positive thoughts about you during your journey -- just please refrain from travelling outside of normal business hours (0800-1200, 1230-1600) as we have no funding for overtime, thus no positive thoughts after 1600 or during lunch.
Perhaps you have a photo or a drawing of a weapon of some sort you could carry with you to show to any wouldbe attackers, kidnappers or terrorists? Perhaps, in your final moments, you could tell them that if our funding gets restored in the next fiscal year, we will come after them with a similar weapon. Oh, if our funding for overtime and travel does *not* also get funded, they will have to come to us (during normal business hours) ... No matter, that still should act as a sufficient deterrent and keep you safe!
V/R
John
