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Compton, MD -- A team of research scientists, working at the ODSS Research Institute (part of the University of Compton campus), have determined that married men, ages 35 to 80, are highest risk of carrying coronovirus without symptoms and is recommending, in a paper to be published Monday in the Stovebolt Journal of Automotive Medicine and Taxidermy, that all men in that age and marital group are to self quarantine immediately to reduce exposure to women and children.
Quarantine centers are being set up in local garages and shops in the greater DELMARVA region. Married men, 35 to 80, are asked to report immediately to their local garage or shop and stay there for at least 14 days or longer if needed. To conserve resources, men are encouraged to "buddy up" in the quarantine centers.
"Well, I don't know about the rest of you weasel turds," said research team lead, Mike Roache, "But I'm feeling no pain, er, I mean no symptoms so I'm getting myself into my garag.... I mean quarantine center immediately."
For more details on this breaking news, please read the full article.
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John "Gort! Klaatu barada nikto. KLAATU BARADA NIKTO!!!!"
Well them. I’ve been quarantining since April. Heck, I’ve been it for 30+ years!
Victor
41 3/4 Ton Pick Up (in process) 55 Grumman Kurbside (Doughboy) 235/3 on tree w/ OD 57 3100 58 C4400 Viking (Thor) 59 C4500 Short Bus (Magic Bus) 59 G3800 1 Ton Dually (Chief)
accurate scientific research from this ODSS organization. please adopt advice immediately. 1000 % more accurate than Fauchi, or whatever his name is. Research lead Roach is way more accurate.
Don't forget to bring elixir into the quarantine. DB is the recommended elixir.
Alec -- good advice. I've seen the advance copy of the full report and they go into some detail regarding the suggested prophylactic treatment for the above mentioned quarantine centers is a common OTC medication most often found as a compound of Di-hydrogen Oxide and CH3CH2OH and sold under a variety of trade/brand names such as "Devil's Backbone Vienna Lager" or, for the more frugal, "Natural Light."
I think Mr. Roache has been deep into his follow up research into this course of treatment and may be unavailable for (lucid) comment for some time.
Carl ... You?? a germaphobe????????
John "Gort! Klaatu barada nikto. KLAATU BARADA NIKTO!!!!"
